Going with the Flow…

I awoke this morning 7am (late for me), and grudgingly made my way to the kitchen for my much needed strong cup o’ Jo… my eyes taking in a strong resemblance to Don Knots (sorry Don!). I reach into the fridge to put my favorite creamer away and with my post-caffeine shaky hands, the creamer slipped and spilled all over the kitchen floor! Ugh. I looked down with my half glazed eyes to see a white river endlessly spreading and making it’s way into the cracks of my once clean floor. Hmmm. Without any movement, without any concern, I paused to look at what could have been a complete disaster. Not even trying to stop the flow from going further. I mean this was French Vanilla for God’s sake and Fat Free no less! Instead… I chuckled to myself like I was in on an inside joke between me and my thoughts. Thoughts that took me back about 9 years ago when if something like this would happen, if something didn’t go right, my schedule got behind in anyway… I would freak out. I wouldn’t shout or scream, but ugh… the fealing of frustration on my schedule being messed up! My how far I’ve come. Is this compassion I’m giving myself? My thoughts actually took me back to a very specific day that I remember vividly. In fact, I think I fortunately remember all my lessons vividly. The girls were only 1 and 3 at the time and I was running late for the gym. Had to hurry to slow down in my much needed yoga class. Had to stress to get to the gym in order to destress in yoga. Ironic? One of my many weaknesses I was working on was to relax, go with the flow, not be so damn scheduled! Why is it others can be late for occasions and be perfectly fine about it, but I just can’t? No, I have to arrive promptly 1 minute before the start of an event… and this was one of those mornings. Running late, kids crying in the car, because they didn’t want to go to the gym…. again…. why, they’d cry I had no idea, because they totally forgot about me, once they were there. I grab hold of a huge heavy bag of cat litter in the garage to move it to another area and, splat! The once heavy bag, slowly became lighter and lighter as every tiny seed of litter spilled into a mountain of granuals and dust! My first reaction was to freak, but this time something spectatular happened. I stopped myself literally in mid-thought and smiled. I said out loud, “This is a test, and only a test. How I respond to this test will reflect any and all of my mishaps in the future.” I got it. The Universe tests us in many ways. The more angry we get about our frustrations in life… be it a slow line at the grocery store, a traffic jam when running late for an appointment, or spilled litter… the more tests we receive! If we learn to handle them with grace and ease, the less those tests appear. I’d say that is good old fashion Karma. A Universal Energy that is so organic in nature, it can never be destroyed. And so, I sighed a deep breath, tuned out my crying kids and tended to my mountain of kitty litter only to realize that it was okay to be late, okay my kids were crying if they’re not hurt and okay that the morning didn’t go according to plan. This specific incident radically changed my behavior towards schedules and I now see myself like the puddle of cream stretching it’s boundries on my kitchen floor and relate to it, because I know deep down inside, I am just like that cream…..I’m going with the flow.

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