Divine after Dysfunction…

This blogger is back and as my Netpal Felicia puts it… a Blogcation was key in order to rejuvenate my voice as empowered woman, mompreneur, wifey and most importantly, good old fashioned – MOM.

Taking most of the summer off from writing and researching “stuff”, marketing and advertising “stuff”, I’ve been trying to figure out my role in this Universe as the struggle of my off again, on again romance with my business continues to put our relationship through the ultimate test.  Trusting our Super Glue bond was meant to last forever, has been leaving me wondering if this has always been a one sided relationship.  A dysfunctional relationship at that.

Products always sitting there looking pretty…

Red Goddess Celebration Box

with shiney tassels that adorn each box gracefully awaiting the presence of a young girl to open it, praise it and cherish it high on a shelf for all to see. While I on the other hand find myself holding high expectations, sure to magnify any flaws and enable our dysfunctional relationship to continue as years pass.  Why I would never do such emotional damage to my own child, let a lone a product that has done nothing but bring joy into young girls lives.

This summer was spent surrendering each layer of that dysfunction one by one…. tear by tear, affirmation by affirmation.  I couldn’t have told you that this was what I was doing during the peeling of the layers, but after spending some time apart…. the finale peacefully ended with no fireworks… just the sound of  rippling inhales filling my lungs, did I realize it was over.  Not our product/person relationship, but my “conditional” relationship with business.  Somewhere along the lines, my expectations must’ve short-circuited so that the driving force keeping my business alive came from fear with the downfall of economy instead of passion.  These dysfunctional relationships that many entrepreneurs go through are common, scary and often kept hidden in the closets with a feeling of failure, but you can always count on me to blurt out my obvious flaws!

My surrendering felt indescribably effortless, spacious, empowering and relaxing all the same time.  I have felt my “no expectation” rule of thumb on many, many issues from personal to physical, but I have never felt a feeling so comfortable in the business world.  It makes me think of my comfortable home base.

It’s important for us to recognize these times when our balance becomes off-kiltered, to allow those layers to peel away and ask ourselves where exactly is my drive (if any) coming from?  Taking our dysfunctional relationship to the overly worn-out couch of a relationship counselor who will tell you  admitting to our faults is key to moving forward in any relationship, business or not.  It is here where once masked layers unveil our core self and shining of new divine light reappears.

Bringing back divine light into my product/business relationship, and the driving force which will enable all young girls to feel a sense of empowerment and strength from one simple product and one simple acknowledgment… the new and improved

http://www.raecole.com

If you’re interested in sharing your empowering products with us, please email us at: info@raecole.com

Unique and Empowering Gifts for the Modern Girl

There’s No Place Like Home…

It’s been a common link between mutual friends lately about our personal relationships with economy, society and toxic situations.  Being in the field I’m in, I’m fortunately surrounded by the most positive of friends with an intricate web for a support system that would make Charlotte’s Web seem minuscule.  How is it that I was blessed enough to have a network such as this?  Easy… I manifested it that way and you can to.

My gracious heart becomes overwhelmed with emotion for my fine assortment of friends, family and colleagues who have been carefully arranged just so… to hoist me up when I fumble into a messy scarecrow of hay particles drowning in prickly straw waiting to be stuffed and put back together again.  With this happening on so many occasions, you’d think my fillings would have turned into the Tin Man by now, but my heart is too full to be a character lacking as such.

As I continue to write this, maybe I can picture myself like Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz.  On her infamous journey to happiness, peace…  home.  Home being state of mind, where everything feels just right, everything falls into place and you feel completely entrusted in the Universe.  A place where it all began, before family, school and society molded you.  Before work and responsibilities labeled you.  Do you remember that person… that state of Mind?  That state of Mind is a true sense of self, fabricated from the Divine or … Home Base.  Where it starts and where it will someday end.  You, me, us at our core -  way before the layers of ego, judgment, guilt or society easily suffocated their way blindlessly on us.  For many spiritual seekers it’s called Samadhi or pure enlightenment.  For others it’s simply called happiness.  I like to think of it as Home, because nothing feels quite as good as kicking up your feet, letting loose, leaving “it” all at the door and relaxing into a trusted, safe space such as Home.

It is after all what we all want, isn’t it?  It’s true, we all want it, but we all have very different ways of getting there – as happiness for one person can mean something completely different for another.  If only we would all recognize and honor this path of many, we would understand and appreciate those that come in and out of our lives as the perfect pieces to an ongoing puzzle. Some staying with us for years to come like an old comfy blanket never to be thrown out and those just visiting as if to learn that much needed lesson before journeying back on their yellow brick road.

We in hindsight are all like Dorothy on her winding road, meeting up with some of those important friends in life that we for a moment have a choice whether or not to let in on our journey, as we support each other when hurdling obstacles and dodging toxic people along the way.  She in turn does find her happiness, but only because she consciously surrounded herself with those that would sustain her dream, moving forward and realizing in the end that she had the strength, power and encouragement within her all along.  Home to Dorothy was Kansas, but Home to us can simply be a Mind set.

I apologize as I can’t remember the author that wrote this (maybe you can help me out), but I remember him saying that when he first met his wife, it felt like he’d come home.  I had the very same feeling when dating Hubby… he felt like an energy that had been with me for years, and it was comfortable, familiar and right.  That’s what Home should feel like, that’s what our path should feel like and even though we may get sidetracked and lost along the way, we can always slide into Home Base to intuitively guide us like a handy GPS system already enabled and ready to go.  As we cannot control the pandemonium in the world today… we can only practice the control of visitors, circumstances and thoughts that come in and out of our Home. Just don’t be afraid to shut the door once in a while!

Growing Girls not Growing Pains…

It’s getting closer to the age where my girls are really growing up faster than the blink of eye.  I can remember a time not too long ago when people would ask me what ages my girls were and when I responded, they would always say “Oh, you still have babies!”  But now all that has changed, although still very young, my girls now 10 and 12, I get the response to that same question, with just an “Oh.” and a nod of the head.  “What, my girls are’nt cutesy anymore?”  “Did all that leave when they hit double digits?”  I’d like to think not, but as the days progress and my oldest daughters toes protrudes past her flip flops, sporting a size bigger than mine… my thoughts can only wonder of all the things I need to tell her as she gradually matures into a young woman.

With her entry into Middle School this September, her desires for a cell phone, her endless emails  and her becoming more independent, leave me feeling the need to pull back on her long reigns and strap her close to my side.  I refuse to give in to the shameful teenage years that have gotten such a bad rap for many moons.  I remember once visiting an office while pregnant with my first and the receptionist after congratulating me, went on to say “Don’t believe what you hear about teenage years being the worst years.  I have two teenage girls myself and we’re the closest we’ve ever been.”  How refreshing is that?  As years have gone by, I’ve chosen to deflect the unwanted opinions of others preparing me for the worst and kept that hidden teenage advice as inspirational fuel to trust that these years will bring us nothing but a close bondship.

Bombarded by child protection awareness over TV, radio, internet and the many shows that Oprah has depicted over the years, it’s a wonder we feel comfortable to even take our eyes off our children for a mere second.  I find myself struggling with the balance of repeatedly advising her on all that I know for her safety and then releasing her wings into a world of peer pressure, material wants and the infinite pull of the internet.  After all, didn’t I design a product to help empower the young girl?

My Theory:  Instill, communicate and educate on our family values, their values and equip them with street smarts.  Listen , love unconditionally, and acknowledge all that they feel.  They in turn ignore me, think they know best and most likely try it their own way, right?

My Goal:  I’m thinking listening and communicating are key words here.  With the help of John Gray, author of “Children are from Heaven” and author of the infamous “Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus” , has truely opened my eyes to simply acknowledging my girls fears, concerns or comments without judgement.  It is here they have already become more comfortable with venting their mind chatter to me and it is here that I listen with no critiquing or authority. It is here that I hope to start the basis of open door communication as I know their struggles and challenges will get more intense as they grow.

And about that theory, when they venture out and do things their own way? That’s when they hear the sweet voice of their mother in the back of their head, a similar voice we’ve heard of our own mother’s advice.  And we say, “Damn, she was right again.  The older I get, the more I sound like my mother!”

Please share your comments, suggestions or motherly advice below!